Ranting

I never knew it would be this hard. People say, "What do you do?" I'm not sure where to start. I'm a single mom. I have a full time job (that I love.) I have 14 college credits this term. When I'm done trying to describe what I "do" and the glaze fades from the eyes of the poor sap who asked me, they say, "Wow. You are a busy lady. How do you do it?" Before the question is out though, they have one foot moving the other direction. I don't know how I do it and I know they don't really want to know either. It's not sexy like Erin Brokovich. Or I'm not. Or something. I am developing a deeper understanding of women who stay with men who suck, because sometimes being alone sucks more. I'm also developing a lack of patience for men in general because I just don't have the energy to figure out if their suckiness is worth figuring out. Sometimes I'd love to have someone here to share some inane fact I just learned in my sociology class, or to help start the mac and cheese so I don't lose the steam I have going on the paper I'm writing. And then I figure he would be too busy watching tv to listen to me talk or start the mac and cheese, and then I'd have to wash his socks before I got back to my paper. Makes my empty bed look better. Sometimes I wonder if I have enough brain cells for this. Figure out how to write a grant so the non profit I'm working for stays afloat. Teach myself web programming because we can't afford a web designer and nobody volunteers anymore. Write 4 papers a week and prepare for my math test. Learn Spanish in an online class when I can hardly understand the instructions, and they are written in English. Oh, and I'm sorry, what? My kids need homework help?

What do I do? My brain is too full to answer you now. Ask me in a few years.